Blame it on Rachel Berry
by The Hidden One
Summary: Kurt's family obligations and dislike for Sebastian cause Blaine to attend a Warbler party accompanied by Rachel Berry. It's basically déjà vu, though, as Blaine is reminded that when alcohol and Rachel are involved, sexual orientation just doesn't matter
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **Glee belongs to Fox, of course, and definitely not to me.

So a small warning before we begin. This is a slightly humorous exploration of Blaine's feelings of a Smytheberry romance. I just couldn't stop myself from wondering if he would be jealous that the guy who has been slaving him with attention suddenly turned to the only girl we know Blaine ever kissed/dated. If that idea disgusts you, you could probably skip a few sentences and pretend Blaine is just being protective. However, I would encourage you to suspend your beliefs for a few moments and feel free to laugh at the following.

And yes, I should be working on 'In My Head,' but this just hit me and I couldn't resist :)

* * *

"Wow, it's really pretty."

Blaine had never heard Dalton described as _pretty_, but then again Rachel Berry had never stepped foot in its hallowed halls before. He gave her a quirky smile that may have been a bit patronizing.

"Don't let the guys hear you say that," he told her.

It was weird that he was currently leading Rachel Barbara Berry through the halls of Dalton, that they were currently headed to a Warbler party. Who would've ever thought that Blaine would ever take a _girl_ to a Warbler party? Especially when he was an _ex_-Warbler?

He would, of course, have been attending the party with his current boyfriend Kurt Hummel under normal circumstances. Unfortunately Kurt had family obligations and couldn't come to the party – that's why Rachel was here. Rachel was sort of a…compromise…for a lack of a better term. Basically, it all boiled down to the fact that Sebastian was going to be at the party as well, and Sebastian made Kurt uncomfortable especially when the current Warbler was around Blaine. It was a weird, twisting conversation - Blaine saying he wouldn't attend the party because it made Kurt uncomfortable but Kurt saying that Blaine should go because he really wanted to but Blaine knew that Kurt didn't want him to and Kurt hating that Sebastian was going to be able to target Blaine all night. The end result was Kurt suggesting that Blaine take Rachel.

Kurt had said because Rachel needed a night out after her recent break-up with Finn (a short off period before they were on again, Kurt was sure) but Blaine knew it was because Rachel would be able to verbally berate Sebastian if necessary in a way that Blaine would never be able to manage – especially in her current emotional state.

So, here Blaine Anderson and Rachel Berry were walking through the _pretty_ halls of Dalton to attend a Warbler party thrown in honor of Wes and David being back home from college due to Christmas Break.

"I would be more descriptive and detailed if asked by one of the students or faculty here, of course. Simply using the word 'pretty' to describe the effect of Dalton would only further encourage the opinion that those who attend public schools are unintelligent and lacking in vocabulary. While that opinion may be true in reference to some of my classmates, that is certainly not true for me and I intend to showcase that," Rachel said at her usual fast pace.

"I don't think anyone is going to ask you about Dalton, seeing as you don't attend. And don't worry, most of the people here don't care that you go to a public school," Blaine reassured. "Some of the girlfriends of the guys go to public schools, too."

"What about boyfriends? Were you the only gay guy in the Warblers, or are they simply dating in-house?"

Blaine laughed. "I was the only gay guy in the Warblers at the time, yes, though we suspected a few of them were merely denying their attraction to each other. We're still waiting for the day they realize they're in love with each other. That would still classify as 'in-house,' though."

Rachel hmmed. "You'd think an all-male singing group would attract more than that. That's only a stereotypical assumption, though. I'm glad the Warblers are proving to defy that."

Blaine just smiled and shook his head. They turned into a hallway and could hear music playing. "Here we are," Blaine said, and opened one of the heavy wooden doors characteristic of Dalton.

The opening of the door caused an influx of noise to hit them. There was music coming from speakers hooked up to an iPod in the corner to which a few people were dancing, but most people were standing around chatting with drinks in hand. Blaine knew Warbler parties usually got pretty wild but he and Rachel were early.

"Blaine!" someone called and suddenly they were surrounded by a group of guys.

"Hey guys," Blaine said with a genuine smile. He didn't regret his decision to transfer to McKinley, but he really did miss these guys. "This is Rachel," he introduced.

"Hi!" Rachel said brightly but seemed a bit taken aback – probably due to their sudden appearance.

"Rachel Berry? I'm a huge fan," gushed Kim, a sophomore who had joined the Warblers last year. "When you sang your original song last year at Regionals…"he said as he led Rachel away from the group. Rachel had the biggest smile on her face as he continued to flatter her.

"Was that…planned?" Blaine asked, confused.

"We might have encouraged him. Mentioned who she was and that she was single, that he should be the one to make her feel comfortable…" Jeff explained.

Blaine laughed. "He might regret that decision," he said and he could already see Rachel talking at high speed to Kim, "but thank you for the effort."

"Well come on and join the party! It's as much for you as it is for Wes and David," Nick said.

Blaine happily did.

* * *

As expected, the party grew as time passed. People stopped chatting and ended up on the dance floor with the music turned up accordingly. Someone had sneaked alcohol onto the grounds and it was flowing freely. Unfortunately, Blaine had seen Rachel partaking so he refrained so that he could drive them back to Lima at the end of the night. He didn't feel too badly about not drinking, though, because he knew that she was still upset over her split with Finn despite how temporary everyone assumed it was.

Plus the lack of alcohol was helping him stay keen on evading Sebastian, who had eventually shown up. So far, Blaine had been fairly successful at avoiding the lead Warbler. Which was really for the best as Rachel didn't seem to care too much about being the _guardian_ (not that Blaine needed one, he would never cheat) and was more interested in the music or talking to Kim – who looked like he sincerely regretted his previous attention.

This was fantastic, catching up with Wes and David, hanging out with the Warblers. Keeping one eye out for Sebastian was a small price to pay for seeing everyone again.

The music was turned down briefly so it wasn't as pounding and there was a shout, "Spin the Bottle!" before it resumed its previous volume.

Blaine laughed but made no move to leave the dance floor. Spin the Bottle was only ever played at Dalton when there were significantly large numbers of _both_ sexes – which really wasn't all that often. This time, though, the Warblers went all-out for Wes and David (and Blaine, apparently) and invited their girlfriends and their friends who were girls. There were also non-Warblers present, whom Blaine assumed either knew Wes or David previously or just simply crashed. Other alumni could be present too, for all he knew. Since no one was wearing their uniforms it was hard to tell. But someone had judged the numbers of both genders equivalent enough for a game of Spin the Bottle, apparently.

Blaine didn't feel like joining, though. Sober, it would be hard to explain to Kurt why he participated and it honestly didn't seem all that appealing anyway. He saw Sebastian head over to where a small group was congregating– it was probably his favorite game, he thought a little nastily.

He really was less of a gentleman without the uniform.

Eventually he got curious with the cheers he heard from over where they were playing, though, and went over to watch. He joined Sam, who had the same idea of simply watching…and was gathering potential blackmail material, apparently, as he had is his phone out with the camera setting on.

"Anything good?" Blaine asked him.

"Almost. Wes spun and it _almost_ landed on David but it didn't quite make it. Ended up being David's girlfriend next to him," Sam said.

"Darn it," Blaine said. "That would've been epic. We've been waiting for that to happen for forever."

"Tell me about it," Sam said.

They watched one of the girls spin the bottle and land on Kendra, Sam's sister. "Oh this is perfect," Sam said, getting his phone in position.

Blaine shook his head but didn't interfere. Post-party blackmail always happened. Sometimes the days _after_ a party were crazier than the actual night due to dares, cover-ups, and revenge.

It wasn't until Kim spun the bottle and it landed on Rachel that Blaine even realized she was part of the group. He smiled watching the kiss. Kim would probably appreciate it more than he himself did after his and Rachel's own Spin-the-Bottle-kiss. Kim was actually straight and both Kim and Rachel at least appeared to be less drunk then before. Kim at least looked satisfied afterwards, anyway. Rachel merely giggled and bounced happily. She took her turn.

Blaine watched the bottle spin round and round, mildly curious who Rachel was going to land on.

_Sebastian?_

His eyes widened as yes, he was right, Rachel's spin had the bottle landing on Sebastian. Rachel Berry was about to make-out with Sebastian Smythe. This was _bizarre_. Blaine couldn't exactly explain _why_ it was so weird, just that is simply _was_. His stomach jolted as he heard Rachel laugh...she _laughed_. Shouldn't she be…sad, or something? Angry that she had to kiss her best friend's hated enemy?

It was obvious she wasn't, though, as she got up, flounced over to where Sebastian was sitting on the other side of the circle, and _sat in his lap_. She wasn't straddling him, thankfully, but she was definitely sitting on him and looking…comfortable…pleased…_not disappointed_, not even when Sebastian's hands went around her wait to keep her there.

"You're really cute," Rachel said in a loud whisper. The group laughed. Blaine was in shock.

"I prefer the term 'hot,'" Sebastian replied. Blaine noticed he didn't seem at all displeased with this situation, either. Wasn't he gay? Shouldn't Sebastian be disappointed he was kissing Rachel, a girl? But no, Sebastian was definitely smirking and looking at Rachel like…like…_ugh_.

"That too," Rachel agreed, nodding. She must be drunker than Blaine previously thought.

"Shut up and kiss already," came an exasperated call from someone – Blaine didn't see who.

So they did. Rachel Berry kissed Sebastian Smythe. And they didn't stop, either. Blaine stared in sort of a horrified fascination as Rachel and Sebastian continued to make out. Shouldn't they need air soon? Blaine still had vague memories of his drunken kiss with Rachel and it wasn't _that_ long. Yet still they continued and…was that tongue? Did that mean that Sebastian was better than he was?

He had to admit, it stung his pride a little bit.

Finally, _finally_, the kiss ended.

"Your face tastes fantastic," he heard Rachel say in that same loud whisper, but this time slightly deeper in tone.

Blaine struggled a bit to remember what she told him. Awesome…she had said that his face tasted 'awesome.' Was there a difference in her alcohol-induced state between awesome and fantastic? Which was better? Was he really comparing drunken Spin the Bottle kisses with Rachel between himself and Sebastian?

Sebastian smirked and whispered something in Rachel's ear – most likely a dirty sexual joke. It was definitely dirty, Blaine thought, by her gasp and the widening of her eyes. But then she _giggled_ and proceeded to practically _snuggle_ with _Sebastian_. He knew he hadn't had any alcohol tonight, he could've sworn he was hallucinating in some sort of a drunken stupor.

"Your turn," Kevin said to Sebastian.

Sebastian spun (Rachel was still on his lap) and it landed on Wes. Blaine saw they both made faces – grimaces – before Sebastian dislodged Rachel enough so that he could lean forward and give the slightest peck on Wes' lips. Once again, this struck Blaine as being utterly _backwards_ to how the world was supposed to be for some inexplicable reason.

Sebastian put Rachel back in his lap when finished and went back to whispering things in her ear that caused her to blush. Kim looked upset at the situation and Blaine was grateful someone at least recognized that that image wasn't right.

After a few more uninteresting spins, Blaine decided he just couldn't stare at Sebastian and Rachel acting like a couple...no that was too weird a thought. He couldn't stand Rachel being hit on by Sebastian…or Sebastian hitting on Rachel…or something. He didn't like _this_ – whatever this was. He went back to the dance floor, getting lost in the pulsing music.

* * *

Blaine took another break from dancing but this time _away_ from the corner where the Spin the Bottle game continued. He was chatting with Jeff when Kim came up to them, clearly upset.

"I spend the whole night paying attention to her and she runs off with Sebastian? I hate high school," he said. "And you," he directed to Jeff, "for putting that idea in my head. Honestly."

"Sorry, dude. Bad luck," Jeff sympathized, not taking Kim's hatred to heart.

"Wait. Did you say Rachel _left_ with Sebastian?" Blaine asked heatedly.

"Don't rub it in," Kim said before huffing and leaving.

"Where would Sebastian take her?" Blaine quickly asked Jeff. There were countless classrooms, hideaways, secluded places that they could go.

"I don't know - his dorm? His roommate is usually gone on the weekends so it's possible," Jeff shrugged.

"Where's his room?"

Jeff looked quizzically at him. "Hey, I know Sebastian can be…well, Sebastian, but he's not going to _force_ anything on her."

"Where's his room?" Blaine repeated. Because even though Sebastian probably wouldn't force Rachel to do anything, she was still drunk. And thinking of anything happening between the two of them still made his stomach squirm.

After a bit of hesitation, Jeff answered his question. Blaine left him and quickly glanced around the room, checking Kim's information. He was right – both Rachel and Sebastian were missing. He immediately left the party and made his way towards the wing where Sebastian's dorm was – it wasn't far, but he made sure to thoroughly check the shadowy areas along the way.

This was not how he expected Rachel to distract Sebastian tonight.

He came to a halt outside Sebastian's dorm – and Jeff had better have told him the right one. He knocked strongly on the door three times. "Rachel?" he called. "Sebastian?"

There was no answer, but Blaine persisted and knocked again. "Rachel? Sebastian?" he called louder than before. If they weren't here, where would they have gone?

"_Go away, Blaine_," Rachel's voice filtered through the door.

He gave a small sigh in relief but didn't listen to her. He opened the door and was met with darkness. He froze (how far along were they?) but then flicked the lights on.

So many emotions fluttered through him at the scene. Lots of Sebastian's skin: fear. Only shirtless and Rachel still fully clothed: relief. They were on the bed: nausea. Both looked severely irritated: glee. Their hands were still entwined around each other: anger.

"Blaine!" Rachel said in obvious frustration.

"_This_," Blaine said, pointing between the two of them. "Isn't happening. No way."

"Don't you have a boyfriend to be attending to?" Sebastian asked.

"Shut up, Sebastian. Let go of Rachel. And put your shirt back on!" Blaine said, slightly blushing at the last part. He was _not_ going to stare at Sebastian's chest. Not looking at the muscles. No.

"See something you like?" Sebastian said with his tone laced with suggestion.

"Sebastian," Rachel whined. She tugged at him to get his focus off of Blaine and back to her.

"Rachel, you're clearly intoxicated. We're going home. Now," Blaine ordered. When she didn't make any move to get off of (Sebastian's!) bed, he walked further into the room and tugged her away.

"Blaine, stop!" Rachel whined but she wasn't strong enough to resist being pulled away.

"I can't believe you would take advantage of her when she's obviously _drunk_," Blaine hissed harshly at Sebastian. While Sebastian had also been drinking tonight, he wasn't nearly as affected as Rachel was.

"She wasn't saying no," Sebastian defended. "Quite the opposite, actually." Sebastian grabbed his shirt off the floor and pulled it on - _thankfully_. Blaine had been all too aware that Sebastian had been shirtless previously and now that it wasn't an issue felt he could concentrate better on the situation.

"Blaine, no! _Please_. I want him…" Rachel mumbled, still trying to break away from Blaine's grasp. She was _so_ going to regret this in the morning.

"My point exactly," Sebastian said with his smirk.

"She's _drunk_, Sebastian."

"Blaine, please. He's so attractive…"

"Clearly still has good judgment," Sebastian retorted and _God_ could just stop smirking? And could Rachel just stop _panting_ over him?

"Rachel," Blaine said sternly. "I'm not letting you sleep with Sebastian. Think of Finn." Okay, that was maybe a bit cruel. But if it helped Rachel remember the real world where things weren't so utterly wrong, then it was probably worth it.

It worked as Rachel promptly burst into tears. She was crying odd phrases that didn't make any sense to Blaine but occasionally Finn's name was mentioned.

"Still want to take advantage of her now?" Blaine asked – and okay, it was a little spiteful and bitter. He used the fact that Rachel was now a sobbing mess and _not_ resisting him to pull her out of (Sebastian's!) room. They were definitely leaving Dalton, right now. Blaine wouldn't have had any more fun at the party, anyway, knowing that Rachel would be constantly sneaking out to find Sebastian.

"Don't be an ass, Anderson. And I wasn't _taking advantage_," Sebastian said, following them. The fact that Sebastian was the one calling him an ass - and admittedly it was deserved – just chalked up another reason why tonight was so _unnatural_.

When it was obvious that Blaine was not headed back to the party but instead towards the parking lot, Sebastian broke in. "Don't you need to say goodbye to the Warblers first? I can keep Rachel _occupied_ while you bid adieu," he said.

"Everyone will be too hung over tomorrow to remember if I said goodbye or not so getting rid of me isn't an option," Blaine said, continuing to pull Rachel along. He still managed to send a glare at Sebastian, though.

"Are you seriously upset over this?"

"Aren't you supposed to be _gay_?" Blaine shot back.

Blaine couldn't recognize the look that Sebastian gave him but soon enough he brought smirking to a whole new level. "Are you _jealous?_" he asked and Blaine could hear the laughter in his voice.

"_No_," Blaine vehemently denied. "I'm _angry_ that you were about to take advantage of one of my best friends who is a _girl_," he explained.

"I obviously wasn't taking advantage of anything except for her wanting me," Sebastian said with that stupid smirk, "so that must mean that you're jealous that I wasn't propositioning _you_."

"There's just no reasoning with you," Blaine said in exasperation.

They finally made it outside of Dalton and the cold air seemed to revive Rachel somewhat, at least the point where she stopped crying.

"Is the party over?" she asked.

She sounded so sad that Blaine couldn't help softening his tone as he responded, "Yes, Rachel, the party is over. We're going home now."

"But…but Sebastian…you _promised _me – " Rachel started.

"Rain check, Rachel," Sebastian interrupted, leaving Blaine with widened eyes and a blush as to the implications. Was this what Rachel wanted with him, too, and he was just too much of a gentleman? Was this how Kurt felt when he made out with Rachel last time? Except now it was an entirely different situation because it's not like he wanted to date either Rachel or Sebastian, of course.

"This isn't happening," Blaine said pityingly to the sky.

Sebastian chuckled but Rachel was confused, "What isn't happening?"

They had finally reached Blaine's vehicle and he let go of Rachel to better dig for the keys in his pocket. Sebastian, of course, took advantage of this opportunity and grabbed her himself. Okay, so maybe _grabbed_ wasn't the best description – he really only took her face in his hands to direct her to look at him – and managed to pull her a bit away from Blaine, too.

"Rachel," Sebastian said in a tone that Blaine didn't think he'd ever heard from him before. He still sounded entirely too amused at this scene, though. "Blaine isn't going to let us have any more fun tonight."

"That's mean," Rachel whispered.

"Yes, yes it is. Make sure to tell him that the whole way home."

Blaine totally saw the smirk directed towards him as he unlocked his car. "You'll thank me in the morning," he defended.

"I certainly won't," Sebastian said.

But Rachel pushed away from Sebastian and Blaine saw the confusion on his face. Fortunately for Sebastian's sake, he easily let Rachel go as she hurried around to the passenger's side of the vehicle. She opened the door but didn't get in, instead appeared to be looking for something.

"Rachel? What are you…?" Blaine asked. Was she finally realizing that she had been hanging off of Sebastian Smythe all evening?

"He needs my number!" she shouted. "He needs my number because mean Blaine won't give it to him. Pen…pen…ha! Female purse to the rescue!" she finished triumphantly.

As she flounced back over to Sebastian who was, of course, smirking, Blaine hit his forehead with his hand. "_Rachel_." Honestly, this was taking so much effort.

"Relax, Anderson, it's just her phone number. If she doesn't want me when she's cold sober I'm sure she won't hesitate to let me know."

Blaine sighed. That was true enough.

Rachel, however, had not found a pen in her purse. She wasn't even carrying a piece of paper. Instead, she had a tube of lipstick and a mischievous (_sexy_?) look in her eyes. She bit her lip before boldly lifting Sebastian's shirt up. Blaine stared in shock while Sebastian laughed and helped her keep his shirt around his shoulders as Rachel Berry scrawled her phone number in lipstick across Sebastian's bare chest. Oh God. It would be almost funny…except it totally wasn't.

Rachel seemed very concentrated on her task – or maybe it was her other hand that was now caressing Sebastian's abs. Blaine couldn't help but watch Sebastian's muscles clench at the touch and he found himself vindictively hoping that she would give him the wrong number in her drunken state. Finally, Rachel had written enough digits that could classify as a phone number. She didn't stop there, though. She actually put some of the lipstick on before kissing Sebastian's skin right after her phone number, leaving an imprint of her lips.

Blaine finally reached over and pulled her away when she didn't seem inclined to stop at just one kiss. "Okay, Rachel. Say goodbye to Sebastian," he said, pulling her back to the passenger side.

"Bye Sebastian," she said obediently but there was enough heat in the tone to spike Blaine's irritation.

"I'll text you," Sebastian said his voice deeper than normal and it put Blaine on edge.

"You have my number," Rachel said happily as Blaine shoved her into her seat and buckled her in.

"I like her," Sebastian chuckled as Blaine shut her door. "She'll regret this tomorrow morning," Blaine said confidently.

"Don't be so sure," Sebastian teased. "And you are so jealous, Anderson, it's hilarious."

"I am_ not jealous_," Blaine hissed at him before climbing into his seat and slamming his door closed forcefully, cutting off any reply Sebastian may have had.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Glee belongs to Fox and I own nothing!

So, this was meant to be the end. However, I had some lovely inspiration earlier for a bonus scene featuring a drunken Sebastian with a more sober Rachel (turning the table!). So if you stick around, you may get some bonus hilariousness even though this is technically complete as is. Enjoy!

* * *

"…and after it was discovered that Finn had already eaten the dessert earlier that day, I'd have to say that the unfavorable impression Grandmother had of him has been permanently cemented."

Kurt was re-telling the disaster that was the family obligation that had taken up most of his time this weekend. Fortunately, Kurt was free today to spend some time with Blaine before the school week. Blaine was exceedingly grateful – being with Kurt was normal. Natural. The world righting itself was something he needed after the party Friday night.

"How was the Warbler party?" he asked, curiously. Blaine opened the door to the Lima Bean and held it open for his boyfriend.

"Oh, you know, it was great. It was good to see all the guys again, especially Wes and David," Blaine started. Despite the party being Friday night and it was now Sunday, Kurt had been too preoccupied with relatives to send more than an occasional 'miss/love you' text. Blaine had yet to explain what had happened between Rachel and Sebastian, and to be honest he didn't even know how to begin to explain it. Would Kurt feel it was as weird as he did, or merely be grateful that Sebastian was no longer pursuing Blaine?

"I'm sorry I couldn't make it. It would've been a great reunion," Kurt said, eyeing him curiously. Blaine was never talented at hiding things and Kurt could probably tell.

"Yeah, they all missed you. They were sad you couldn't make it," Blaine said.

"Uh huh," Kurt said, his eyes narrowing. "Are you not telling me something?"

"Um…I'm just…how do I…?"

"Does this have anything to do with Sebastian?" Blaine could hear the anger in his tone.

"Well, yes," he admitted, "but it's _not_ what you're thinking…" Blaine quickly said.

"Why don't we just ask Rachel, hm? If Sebastian was harassing you then I want the unedited version," Kurt said and then walked swiftly away from him.

"Rachel? But…" Blaine tried to say and immediately followed Kurt. Then he saw what Kurt had – that Rachel was sitting by herself at a table, coffee in hand and browsing through her phone. Rachel had only replied 'fine, thank you' to Blaine's text of 'how are you feeling?' yesterday, so he had no clue how she was feeling about anything that happened last Friday night.

"Rachel!" Blaine said in surprise.

She looked up at the call, but the original smile on her face reversed into a frown. Weird. "Blaine, I sincerely appreciate that you care but honestly, I am totally fine and can handle myself. I am making this decision having a complete hold of my senses."

Blaine was bewildered and he was sure it showed on his face. "What?"

"As a genuine friend, I am politely telling you to mind your own business."

"Rachel, I honestly don't know what you're referring to," Blaine said a bit helplessly. Sometimes he hated the tendency that both Rachel and Kurt had to just jump immediately into a conversation without any lead-in. _They_ could usually catch on to what each other were saying but sometimes, like now, Blaine was simply lost.

"Why are you wearing a scarf?" Kurt said suspiciously, eyeing her. Okay, well _that_ was off-topic, but Blaine knew how important fashion was to his boyfriend.

"It's cold," Rachel said defensively. She fidgeted.

"Not _inside _it isn't. And you don't typically wear scarves as evidenced by it being totally uncoordinated with the rest of your outfit," Kurt accused.

"I-I felt like it," Rachel said heatedly but avoided eye contact. Even Blaine knew that was Rachel-Berry-speak for she was hiding something.

Quick as a flash, Kurt reached out and snatched the scarf away from her neck. Blaine was honestly surprised at the sudden movement and so was Rachel who nearly spilled her coffee.

"Kurt!" Rachel hissed but it was too late for both Kurt and Blaine had seen what she had attempted to hide.

"Okay, I know for a fact that Finn did not give you _that_," Kurt said, pointing accusingly towards the dark bruise on Rachel's neck at the junction where it met her shoulder. Blaine stared.

"That's because Finn _didn't_," Rachel said angrily in response, rearranging the scarf to re-hide the hickey.

"It wasn't…?"Blaine trailed off in question, eyes wide. It was obvious as Rachel refused to look at him that it was, though. _Sebastian_ gave her that hickey? He didn't notice _that_ on Friday night. His stomach felt just as queasy as it did on Friday, now.

"Okay, someone needs to start making sense here because I am utterly lost," Kurt said, looking between Rachel and Blaine. Personally, Blaine felt it was Rachel's story to tell – especially since he didn't really know how to explain to Kurt exactly what and _why_ whatever happened actually happened. Rachel, however, didn't seem inclined to explain.

"Did this happen at the Warbler party last Friday?" Kurt asked and even Blaine needed confirmation. Rachel and Sebastian hadn't met up yesterday, did they? All the things an unsupervised Rachel and Sebastian could potentially get up to for an entire Saturday…Rachel nodded and the knot in Blaine's stomach loosened.

Kurt rubbed his temples. "Let me guess. You got drunk again and made out with some Warbler." Kurt then smacked Blaine's arm. "Why weren't you watching her?"

"Me? But I-" Blaine started to defend himself but he was cut off.

"On the contrary, Blaine definitely could've paid _less_ attention to Rachel."

Blaine withheld a groan as who else but Sebastian Smythe broke in with an incredibly large smirk. He proceeded to sit across with Rachel with a coffee in hand, looking incredibly amused at the situation. Blaine wished he could just gift Sebastian with some of the irritation that he felt.

"No one asked you," Kurt said derisively.

"And no one asked Blaine to play big brother on Friday night," Sebastian retorted back. "Or are you finally going to admit you were simply jealous?"

Blaine could see Kurt's confusion on his face before suddenly the pieces clicked for him.

"Oh my God, you let him _touch_ you?" Kurt hissed angrily at Rachel. Blaine almost sighed in relief when it was Rachel that received Kurt's ire and not himself. But of course Kurt wasn't going to believe Sebastian's hype that Blaine was jealous - because the idea was ridiculous.

"Trust me, she would've let me do more than _touch_ if –" Sebastian started but was interrupted by Rachel's squeak of "Sebastian!"

"Wait… are you two…on a…date?" Blaine asked. Rachel wouldn't usually come to the Lima Bean alone and he and Kurt certainly didn't know she was going to be there. It usually felt like Sebastian lived here but he actually sat at Rachel's table and looked comfortable – like he was invited. Blaine got the distinct feeling he was intruding on something.

"We would be if you two would leave," was Sebastian's reply.

Rachel blushed. Kurt was speechless. Blaine felt completely and utterly shocked that Rachel didn't regret her actions last Friday night and was actually _seeing_ Sebastian when she was level-headed two days later. Wasn't the world supposed to be right again once they left Dalton?

"Aren't you gay?" Kurt asked bluntly. "Or was that whole hitting on Blaine thing just a passing fancy?"

"I go after what I want," was Sebastian's haughty reply.

"And now you want _Rachel_?" Kurt deadpanned. Blaine felt slightly sympathetic for Rachel who looked mildly offended.

"I definitely want the girl who wrote her phone number in lipstick across my chest," Sebastian said with a wink at Rachel, who promptly turned scarlet.

Kurt was, once again, speechless. His jaw actually dropped. Blaine himself was blushing at the memory – in embarrassment for Rachel, of course, not because the image of Sebastian's muscles was brought back to mind. Apparently Rachel had managed to write her correct phone number, though. Blaine was mildly impressed but more so irritated. He was honestly starting to wish that Friday night never happened, even though he had loved hanging out with his Dalton friends again.

"She was drunk," Blaine argued. He needed to get Rachel to see that Sebastian was bad news. Shouldn't she have regretted everything yesterday when she woke up? And Sebastian should know that what he had run into on Friday night really wasn't typical Rachel Berry behavior.

"And I need to see if she kisses just as well sober." Another wink.

Kurt seemed to be getting over his shock. "What about Finn?" he asked Rachel.

"What about him?" Rachel shot back. "We broke up."

"You _always_ go back to Finn," Kurt said, rolling his eyes. _Always_, he mouthed to Blaine.

"We'll see about that," Sebastian said, giving a heated look to Rachel. She was blushing again but there was a small smile on her face.

Blaine felt like he was losing track of this entire conversation. Was Rachel really picking Sebastian over Finn? Were they really on a date? Why did that idea make him feel nauseous?

"And now, if you two don't mind, my _date_ and I would appreciate some privacy," Sebastian said politely but with the obvious implication that Kurt and Blaine should leave immediately.

"Rachel…?" Blaine asked. He didn't know what he was hoping for – that she would tell them to stay? To deny that she was actually on a date with Sebastian? To admit it was all some joke or revenge scheme against Finn?

"I already told you two to politely mind your own business," Rachel said primly, crushing whatever weird hope Blaine may have had.

"This conversation isn't over, Rachel Berry," Kurt said darkly before he pulled Blaine away from the table and out of the Lima Bean – even though they hadn't gotten any coffee. "You," Kurt hissed to him as they walked back to Blaine's vehicle, "need to explain to me in exacting detail what happened on Friday night _right now_."

* * *

Yes, the world had upended and didn't appear to be righting itself anytime soon. The rest of the week was like watching a bad horror movie, Blaine thought. You could already see what was going on and who was going to die - you were just waiting for it to finally happen. No one was actually going to die, of course. It was just the analogy Blaine came up with to explain the madness that was happening the following week at McKinley.

All the signs were there. Not everyone saw them, but Finn was Kurt's stepbrother and Rachel his best friend so naturally Kurt and by extension Blaine kept a careful eye out.

Rachel received random, unexplained text messages throughout the day (except when Blaine knew were Warbler rehearsal times) that would case her to smile, blush, roll her eyes, or all three at once. She always responded immediately. She continued to wear scarves – which Blaine thought was rather obvious because she really didn't have all that many. Occasionally she would mix it up with a turtleneck sweater.

Kurt and Blaine never caught Rachel and Sebastian together again at the Lima Bean. Rachel's absence wasn't a surprise because she was never the regular customer that he and Kurt were. However, it was highly unusual that Sebastian no longer frequented the Lima Bean either, when usually he had shadowed their table a few times a week.

The biggest clue of all was the _lack_ of sad, puppy-dog eyes that Rachel had always sent Finn's way. That look was now gone. Rachel Berry did not appear to be pining after Finn Hudson. Even more crazy? She didn't even seem to notice the sad, hurt looks that _he_ sent _her_ way. It was obvious that things were not right at McKinley.

One day after New Directions had won their Sectionals, the horrible monster that Blaine knew had been lurking (yes, it resembled Sebastian Smythe in his mind) finally reared its head in Glee. Blaine had the suspicion that Kurt had finally clued Finn into what was going on.

Finn, of course, had gone into a ranting lecture about how he and Rachel were supposed to be together, how she had promised they'd have senior year, how she was blowing their argument out of proportion. They were supposed to be together, he had said. She wasn't supposed to go making out with some random guy and meeting up with him when he obviously only wanted her for sex.

Okay, so it was obvious that Finn's source of information was Kurt. Especially since Finn had copied some of Kurt's phrases to describe Sebastian. Craigslist references? It had Kurt written all over it.

Rachel's reply left everyone speechless.

"You know what Sebastian appreciates about me that you don't, Finn? My intelligence. You know what Sebastian gives me that you don't? Confidence. You know what Sebastian has that you don't? Passion - and no, that isn't a euphemism for sex and honestly it's none of your business if it is. But you don't get to stand there and lecture me about my relationship with Sebastian because like usual, you don't have a clue. And yes, he may be snarky and insulting but he does so _cleverly_ in a way that you couldn't begin to comprehend. And if you're so worried about Regionals, get a grip and act like the professional I already am. Because even if Sebastian ends up breaking my heart thirty seconds before we go out on stage I will still be able to give the most gut-wrenching, soul-rendering performance those judges have ever seen."

She took a breath.

"Personally, I feel like _your_ showmanship could use a little work."

And with that, she executed the perfected Rachel Berry storm out. Blaine felt like clapping…or punching Sebastian in the face. Everything was kind of a mix of tumultuous emotions and conflicting desires and a rush of knowing that something major just happened but he didn't quite understand all the consequences of it.

By the time the Regionals competition was on them, the world still hadn't righted itself and this crazy backwardness was almost becoming normal. Because despite Finn's barbs and sad eyes, despite Kurt's vehement belief that Sebastian was going to break Rachel into pieces, and despite Blaine's desire for this only be a brief period of madness, Rachel Berry and Sebastian Smythe continued to see each other…go out together…_date_ (like, boyfriend/girlfriend). And yes, Rachel had continued to wear scarves. Quinn had been nice enough to go out shopping with her for a few more as Kurt had refused on principle.

Blaine had been searching for the group of Dalton Warblers to congratulate them on a great performance after the New Directional's win at Regionals when he saw them. They were in a shadowy area of the hallway, but it was clear that it was Sebastian who had Rachel backed up against the wall. His blazer was open and his shirt untucked. Both of his hands were on her hips while hers were around his neck. It was obvious he had run into them post- (heated)-kiss.

It was almost worse than if he had caught them mid-make-out. Their foreheads were pressed together and they were simply _looking_ at each other (they didn't even notice him) – and Blaine felt his stomach drop.

Okay, so maybe he could admit (only to himself) that he was a little jealous. It was just weird, knowing that if he had chosen differently it could have been him…in either position. So who was he jealous of? Sebastian for getting Rachel…or Rachel for getting Sebastian? Oh God, it couldn't be _both,_ could it?

He needed to go find Kurt.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:**Glee belongs to Fox, not to me.

Here's the bonus scene I wasn't expecting to happen but super glad it did. I feel like it completes the story in a way it hadn't been before, as short as it is. And writing a drunk Sebastian was very fun and really only fair!

To the reviewers, thank you so much. I'm glad you've appreciated the story and taken the time to let me know! To everyone, please enjoy the final installment of _Blame it on Rachel Berry_.

* * *

It was New Direction's third party celebrating their Nationals win. The multiple party idea was Rachel's, actually, since she didn't feel that such a victory could be adequately compensated by only one festivity – no one else was going to argue with her, of course. That's why Blaine and the rest were currently at Santana's house, as Rachel and Sugar had thrown parties last week.

Santana's party was, however, the first time that Rachel had invited her _boyfriend Sebastian_ (Blaine still felt like was waiting for the punch line, even now) along. She hadn't brought him previously because of something about not rubbing it in the Warbler's face that they had won…but Blaine was certain that Kurt had only tried to spare Finn some heartbreak but had run out of blackmail material that stopped Rachel from inviting Sebastian.

Immediately upon Sebastian and Rachel's arrival (because they arrived _together_, of course), Finn had challenged Sebastian to a drinking game. Blaine had watched in morbid fascination as Sebastian drank Finn under the table – which he and everyone else in the room had predicted, of course. Finn may be a large guy but he didn't really handle alcohol well and Sebastian definitely trumped him in experience. Even Kurt didn't have any sympathy for Finn because he had warned him repeatedly about this… Blaine was just glad that he didn't have to watch Rachel cheering for Sebastian anymore.

Blaine only felt worse as the night wore on (and he didn't think it was the lukewarm beer in his cup). He saw Santana drag Sebastian over for a challenge of what appeared to be a never-ending line of body shots. Sebastian was taking his off of Rachel and Santana off of Brittney – and they proceeded to lick the salt off of increasingly inappropriate places. Blaine didn't know what made him sicker – Rachel's (and Brittney's too, of course) giggles as they let it happen or the _way _that Sebastian (…and Santana) looked at them as they did it.

Blaine set his drink down when he saw it happening and was grateful he hadn't had too much yet. He needed to keep a clear head and be conscious of what Rachel and Sebastian were doing – just in case he had to interfere again. He didn't care that Rachel hadn't appreciated his actions before…he was going to do it again anyway if he felt it necessary. Kurt appreciated the decision too, as he could now hold intelligent conversation even as he kept his attention divided.

Then Blaine realized that while he knew and had seen Sebastian drink… he had never seen him _drunk_. That had now changed.

"WHAT IS LOVE? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more!"

Sebastian did not sing on key when he was drunk…or appear to care about it. He and Santana were singing and dancing together on top of a table – were they attempting to duet together? It wasn't working, whatever it was. Blaine stepped in to help a (thankfully) still sober Rachel beckon Sebastian off before he hurt himself. Brittney was doing the same for Santana but she appeared to be handling it just fine by herself from Blaine's perspective.

"You're pretty," Sebastian said to Rachel as Blaine prevented Sebastian from collapsing on her.

"Thank you. And you're drunk," Rachel said with amusement, helping Blaine keep Sebastian standing.

"Yes," Sebastian heartily agreed. "But handsome! Very handsome," Sebastian added with a slur. Rachel laughed but easily agreed.

"He should lie down for a bit," she said to Blaine.

"There's a couch," Blaine said, pointing at a free couch over by the wall.

"Come on, Sebastian. You need to lie down before you hurt yourself," Rachel said as they gently prodded and pulled Sebastian (why did he have to be so _tall_?) over to the couch.

"But I won! I beat…her," Sebastian said, wildly waving his arm in what Blaine assumed was supposed to be Santana's general direction. "Her. I beat her. I won!" Blaine wasn't exactly sure what the competition was – the shots? The singing? Blaine heard Santana's shout of 'No you didn't!' from across the room but was glad Sebastian didn't.

"Yes you did. Now come lie on the couch," Rachel coaxed.

"Is it my prize?"

"Yes, Sebastian, the couch is your prize for beating Santana," she answered. Blaine was feeling especially resentful about this entire situation. Rachel's voice was only increasing his irritation – a mix of humor, patience, and something like adoration.

Finally, they had reached the couch. "I claim this couch in the name of me!" Sebastian said victoriously before flopping down onto it. He let out an 'oomph' on impact. Rachel giggled as Sebastian stretched out across the couch. Blaine did have to admit it was funny, especially since Sebastian seemed so happy with the large grin (not even a hint of a smirk!) across his face.

Then, however, Blaine found the situation not so humorous as Sebastian tugged Rachel down on top of him. "Sebastian, what are you doing?" she asked but she didn't seem at all angry about it – more amused.

"Rach_el_. I want the couch _and_ you," Sebastian responded insistently. Blaine didn't like the implications of such a statement. Sebastian could be very forward sober and Blaine didn't know if he could control himself when drunk – Rachel certainly couldn't, after all.

"Oh Sebastian," Rachel said with a huff but Blaine could see her smile – he frowned. "Okay. But you need to scoot over," she said, shifting in his grip. Sebastian let out another shout of triumph and loosened his hold. They shifted on the couch until Rachel was laying down with her head on the arm rest. Sebastian was on his side stretched out next to her along the back of the couch. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, nuzzling his face into her neck.

Blaine almost found the picture they made cute except his stomach was twisting too much.

"Blaine, would you mind getting a glass of water? I don't think we'll be moving until morning," Rachel said to him but didn't take her eyes or her soft smile off Sebastian.

Blaine wanted to say a lot of things. He wanted to refuse and let Sebastian wake up with as much and prolonged pain as possible. He wanted to say that there's no way he was letting them cuddle on the couch for the rest of the night. He wanted to offer Sebastian a ride home to Dalton right now to separate the two of them. He wanted Rachel to be disgusted at Sebastian's drunken display (even though he hadn't done anything too untoward yet) and he wanted Sebastian to stop being charming even when drunk (it just wasn't fair!).

He said none of these things, though, and instead went to fetch the water that Rachel asked for. He did so as quickly as possible without _seeming_ to be rushing in case Sebastian was going to try anything while he was gone. That logic didn't make much sense since Sebastian didn't even seem to notice him and it's not like the two of them were alone - just tucked away in a corner of the room all of New Directions was still in – but still. If he came back and Sebastian's hands…mouth…_anything_ was inappropriately placed, he would dump the water all over the pair and happily face the wrath of Rachel Berry.

That being noted, Blaine didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed that when he returned with a glass of water, he only had to set it on the side table.

The two of them were definitely more adorable than indecent. Rachel had wrapped her arm around Sebastian so that she could gently run her fingers through his hair. The ministrations were causing Sebastian's usually styled hair to come undone and a fringe was falling into his eyes. His head was still underneath her chin, face buried in her neck, but Blaine could see his goofy yet happy grin. His arms tightened around Rachel's waist and Blaine thought if Sebastian was a cat right now, he would be purring. As it was Blaine suspected that Sebastian was letting out a low, content hum that was the cause of Rachel's soft smile.

Only Sebastian Smythe would get _more_ socially appropriate when he was drunk.

Rachel mouthed 'thank you' and Blaine merely smiled at her before walking over to his boyfriend who was watching them from a distance. "Is it horrible of me to say that I like the drunken Sebastian Smythe more than the sober one?" Kurt asked him.

"He took me by surprise too," Blaine commented. He never would have guessed that Sebastian was an adorable drunk. It was almost comical that Rachel and Sebastian completely reversed roles when drunk – Rachel got more sexual, Sebastian got less.

Once again, Blaine felt jealousy gnawing on his insides. He was jealous that it was Sebastian who received Rachel's attention and ministrations. He was jealous that it was Rachel who got to see the softer sides of Sebastian. He turned away from the pair, knowing that he was jealous of _them together. _

"Something wrong?" Kurt asked him, concerned. Blaine took a breath and exhaled. "No, of course not," he said with a smile that maybe was a bit forced. He leaned forward and kissed his boyfriend.

When he pulled away, he felt much better and his smile was completely genuine.


End file.
